The Deceptive Mind - Chapter 7

The Deceptive Mind

Chapter 7

This is purely a work of fiction and is not intended for any one dead or alive. Although it has been written in autobiographical style this is no way related to my experiences or a memoir. Since the content is suited for adult, readers discretion is advised

I couldn’t concentrate at the gaming center. I missed hitting the ball almost every time I played and was getting disinterested in their company. I took leave from the group citing health reasons and went to the lake front to spend some time alone. I was pensive and trying to contemplate all that happened with Gina and Prakriti.

It is so hard to understand a woman. She is such a wonderful creation of God but her world is entirely different. A man always sees her with the view of his experience and the character that he is made of. For anyone who has the tendency to fall for petty reasons will expect the world to behave similarly but hardly he knows that the society is full of complex elements that act on individuals and detract them from being simple. Emotion for a man is always at his plain sight and he reacts to it with a linear approach but for a woman her reactions to them depend on many factors like integrity, suspicion, reliability and long-term vision. There is nothing wrong in her but that makes her indecisive and too analytical which will hinder her from enjoying some of the best moments of life or in some cases getting into unworthy relationships that will break her heart for a long time.

My feelings towards Prakriti were so pure and passionate and I always felt I can make a world for her and make myself worth to live in it yet she never comes out of that reserved character. And Gina on the other hand has this naïve way of trusting everyone to try to test relationships and later mend them accordingly. This way she gives her heart a chance to get hurt by some of the worst people on earth. I wonder who could halt her from switching relations. . Her ambitious character gave her the courage to move along with people and probably to move on with break up as well. Sometimes it surprises me as to why didn’t she try me?

For a moment I wanted to quit trying both of them but they were the only sweethearts I knew in my life. No one has ever come so close to my heart like both of them. You might be wondering what happens to the other if I get one. I am not greedy to think that I will get both but if I was fortunate enough to get one then I will keep the other one close to heart but at an arm’s length.

If the world is according to our whims then our mind will never have bounds. As an ardent lover it is my duty to have perseverance in my trials but my circumstances show a dismal picture.  My words seem boring but this is a situation that every heartbroken has to go through. Oh! Why am I letting my mind wandering, for it chooses to hover around those angels than seek comfort?  Is this true love or has my mind been deceptive? Wars had been fought and wealth was set as pawn for this single feeling called love. Love is so deceptive that it turns your friends as foes and makes a timid into a ravaging bull. Before my thoughts could engulf me I stood up to see the setting sun. It looked as if the sun is taking down everything along with him and there is no hope for the next day. The phenomenon of Sun set brings cheers for some and a gloomy effect on others and I fall in the latter group.

Since nothing was inspiring I decided to go home and as I was walking past the parking lot a car stopped my way and I looked up and saw Prakriti in it. I was little embarrassed and shy to look at her for what had happened that morning so continued my walk but I heard she called me to sit in the car. Probably it was the student instinct to obey the master I just opened the door and sat in the car but my head hanging low and was looking at my shoes. By the way I had bought them a week ago and the cushion wasn’t like what the store keeper said. Sorry, let us see what happened there. She was so calm while driving and in fact her body language showed she had something strong in her mind. She looked as if she had something to tell and it was just a matter of moments to come by.

“Keep talking, I like when you yap” she said

Do women take advantage when men feel insecure? Does that give them a pleasure to find them in dominance when men succumb? But do I have a choice? I am like a sandwich between a strict teacher and my emotions. So I spoke.

“Well, sorry for disappointing you but I will complete all my assignments and will clear the tests too in this coming session”

“Sshh, not that crap, I am not at the college, tell me all that you wanted to say this morning, no hesitation, come on speak up, don’t think like I am your college teacher”

Trap, pure trap. But what the hell, she wants to hear my heart without the flowers and all that heavy theatricals so why not speak up?

“Prakriti, I mean Maam, you are the most sincere teacher I have even seen in my life”

"Cut the crap and come to the point”

“You know what. Don’t hide your emotions and your beauty behind your discipline and principles. There are bunch of craps who teach far better than you so don t assume that being composed can make you an intellect. And it is not a sin to have feelings on anyone. Let me not lecture you, it is your job not mine. All I say have to say is I love you and I will make a world that you have dreamt of, a world where there are no barriers and passion rules the free mind. I am not those regular guys but I am a man (becoming one) made of self belief and I carry an aggression to achieve the impossible. You are the most beautiful girl I had ever met and you spell a charm on me and make me dreaming about you. I am not a poet so I cannot speak romantically.” While I was speaking my heart she was without any emotions and had a stone face. Our car reached the end of our street and I got scared if she will go and talk to my grandpa and it made me nervous.

She stopped the car and removed her glasses and placed her lips on mine and that made me breathless and nervous. I was startled and drew my lips back but an urge hit me within and I punched her lips with mine. The next few minutes became the most cherished moments of my life. That kiss which was long-awaited was given with an utmost passion and ecstasy. The world around us vanished and I was hugging her tight as strong as my lips were pressing her. I saw her giving up all those worldly barriers and feeling light like a feather. She stopped first and looked away from me and didn’t speak to me for a while. I opened the door silently and walked to my home.

I went into my house and was almost in some dream world and was stopped by my mom. She gave me a book and said Gina asked her to give it to me. It was some “the adventures of Huckleberry Finn”. I took it upstairs and felt a disgrace on Gina on her immaturity.

I had a shower and was still ecstatic of all that happened that evening and came out and again saw the book that Gina had given. With contempt I opened it and saw that she had circled some alphabets on each chapter. I just arranged them in order and I found out the following

There seems to be something special between us. Meet me soon to figure it out.